The Waiting Game

January 29, 2011

Today I am waiting in anticipation. This stage in the single game always makes me anxious and throws me into a state of  self-analysis. You see dear reader, I met the first potential date of 2011 last night.

I had a feeling it was going to be one of those ‘circle’ nights before I went out. I have adopted the term ‘doing circles’ which refers to the way in which I take a lap of the room when I’m out to see if there is anyone  that has ‘banter’ potential i.e anyone I fancy.

Loads of us from work headed out to celebrate immanent marriages, births and new work arrivals. I work with lots of women, most of whom are either married, engaged or with boyfriends. In fact us single ones are seriously outnumbered by the attached ones.

For this reason, my love life is often a topic of conversation in the office. I don’t mind this at all, in fact I like to hear peoples opinions on my many disastrous encounters. Usually when I go out with work I don’t tend to morf  into ‘circle’ mode as the opportunity never really arises.Work socializing and circles don’t really match.

However, last night it was different. We went to this new bar that is really just one big room so you can see everyone clearly when you arrive. There were loads of after work drinkers out, therefore this meant there were loads of suits out (suits=men).

We had vouchers for cheap cocktails which the bar were promoting so cocktails were aflowing from early in the night. I had spotted a guy in a large group near where we were sitting. We were a large table of women and they were a large table of men right beside us. Obviously conversation was going to ensue.

I really love that moment when you’re in a bar and you see someone who notices you at the same time. It’s kind of an exhilarating feeling not knowing the person at all but still really wanting to talk to them. After we were there for about an hour, I went to the bar to get a drink. I had kind of forgotten about the guy I had been previously throwing glances at as the music they were playing was quite good. Serious dancing had over taken serious flirting.

When I went to the bar there was a bit of a queue where the guy I had been eyeing was loitering. I made my way to where he was standing. Bar chat is always an easy icebreaker. I made some general statement about the slowness of the bar staff and we got chatting.

He was not what I’d usually go for, he was very clean looking. He was incredibly toned body wise. It emerged later he’s really into running which in my opinion deserves serious brownie points. We talked about our jobs. He said he worked with computers. I never know how to react when someone tell me they work in IT because I think it’s such a broad thing to say you work in. It’s like saying ‘I work in the medical field’. Anyway, he didn’t seem to want to elaborate so I didn’t push it.

He obviously had a bit of issue with height as he asked what height I was which I found a little odd. In fairness, I’m about 5’1o in heels but I still don’t think I’m that tall in the grand scheme of things. We were about same height so maybe he is used to small girls. Either way, I found it strange he noted how tall I was. Aside from this, he was a really lovely guy and I enjoyed chatting to him.

He offered to buy my drink but I had my trusty recession voucher from one of those voucher websites so I politely declined. We chatted for a little longer and then I decided to go back to my table. I think it’s important when you’re talking to guy for the first time you don’t come across too eager in the conversation. You give them enough so they find you interesting and then walk away. If they are that interested, you’ll see them later in the night. There are a lot of etiquette rules involved in this ‘circling’ business.

Anyway, I went back to my work companions where a lot of chatter ensued as to who he was, where he was from, what his job was. Then the inevitable ‘hot or not’ issue was debated . We all agreed he was on the hot side of the fence.

Later as I was getting ready to leave, the guy in question came back over and started chatting again. During this conversation it emerged he was 30. I have to admit I was secretly delighted at this fact. For some reason, I get on far better with older guys. At age 30 it is more likely they are over the whole ‘game’ phase of pursuit and will just get on with asking you to meet up again for a drink etc…

Just before I left he asked me for my number. What I really liked was that he suggested we go for lunch sometime. I thought that was really nice. You usually always get the boring ‘so will we go for a drink’ line. He was ultra polite and gave me a kiss on the cheek before I left which again I thought was so sweet.

So now you understand why I am sitting here in anticipation. It’s the next day. Hopefully this clean cut, computer worker/ runner will have found me interesting enough to want contact me again. No matter how many guys I meet, I never fully get used to the feeling of not hearing from someone. I hate it. You always feel like you’ve given away a bit of your personality to a near stranger and they’ve found it dull so punish you with silence. That statement may be on the dramatic side but that’s how I feel sometimes. Everyone likes to think of themselves as nice enough to be contactable again. When you don’t hear from someone it’s disappointing.

My next post will either report on the impending date or the horrible silence. Stay tuned…….


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